By Saro Varjabedian
For most of my life, I’ve considered myself an agnostic. In fact, when asked what I believe in, I would respond by saying that I am devoutly agnostic, which has often been met with some combination of snickers, side-eye, or, in some cases, derision. And I completely understand why I would be met with skepticism. Isn’t the point of being agnostic not to commit to any one position? How could someone be devoutly agnostic?
But to me, being an agnostic is not about avoiding taking a stance on a belief. It is about critically evaluating what I choose to believe in and doing so in a way that is grounded in logic and evidence-based reasoning.
So now, onto the topic of this article: how can an agnostic claim to be spiritual, when spirituality often seems like an amorphous thing with very little supporting evidence?
How I’ve come to reconcile the loose conceptions circulating about spirituality comes down to how I choose to define spirituality.
Oxford’s dictionary defines spirituality as “the quality of being concerned with the human spirit or soul as opposed to material or physical things.” Wikipedia defines it as “generally an individual’s search for ultimate or sacred meaning and purpose in life.”
What if we combine these ideas and define spirituality as the practice of developing one’s fundamental, essential self or “spirit” to the best of one’s abilities? Let’s call it the concerted effort of self-improvement and internal growth.
So, what could that mean in physical, tangible terms when we start to talk about developing one’s “spirit”, another amorphous term often thought of as this metaphysical or ethereal holy ghost?
We’ve all heard of the concept of developing one’s mind, body, and spirit. We can all clearly envision ways to build our minds and bodies. There are very concrete and physical activities we can pursue to develop those aspects of our personhood. To strengthen one’s body, we just need to engage in physical activities with some consistency. To expand and grow one’s mind, we can study, learn, meditate, socialize, or engage in any activity that challenges our mental faculties. So, now, how can someone develop their spirit? Are there specific activities a person can engage in? Or perhaps does working on the mind and body also impact one’s spirit?
I resolve these notions about spirituality and spirit by trying to ground them in some physical, biological process, which might help explain who we are on a fundamental level. As an agnostic, understanding phenomena in a scientific, evidence-based manner is important to me. And of course, science won’t have all the answers, at least not right now. However, I believe that, over time, as our understanding of life and the processes that govern our universe deepens, science will come to explain how even these seemingly metaphysical processes may work.
For now, here is a humble attempt at trying to explain the spirit in physical terms. If we can agree that the spirit represents our essential or fundamental selves, then one mechanism that could help explain what our spirit is can be found in the interplay between genetics and epigenetics.
Our genes are like blueprints or instruction manuals that tell our cells what proteins and functional RNA to produce. Epigenetics refers to the mechanisms our bodies use to regulate and manage how a gene is made active (expressed) or inactive (silenced). Epigenetics does not alter the genetic blueprint, but instead regulates how cells interpret it. And based on how the cells interpret that code or blueprint, it determines how much they will ramp up or tamp down the construction of the protein associated with that gene. Think of Epigenetics as the knob on a faucet controlling the flow of proteins being synthesized. So if a gene defines what protein cells will produce, epigenetics determines how much or how little of that protein to make.
To put this pragmatically, several studies involving identical twins have indicated that phenotype differences are a result of Epigenetics. Scientists have observed for some time that, despite identical twins having the exact same genes, they still exhibit physical trait differences. But how could it be that one identical twin can be taller than the other? Or be fatter or skinnier than the other? Have different skill sets and behaviors? Have different tastes and preferences? What is causing those differences if they are supposed to be identical? Their different spirit or souls?
The answer: Epigenetics. (If you want to read more about it, you can go here)
If epigenetics, in many ways, determines the way your genes will be expressed, then think of every activity, every experience, every environmental factor as acting on your epigenetics. Your body and mind are part of this incredibly flexible organism that responds to and reacts to every environmental factor it encounters and experiences, including your own internal experiences.
And so, what this means in real terms is that who you fundamentally are is the sum of all that came before you. Every action, every choice, every experience, and every environmental factor has shaped you into who you are today. The power of that knowledge is that what you choose to do and encounter going forward will determine who you will be in the future. And so, this provides some context for the tangible choices we can all make to shape our future, fundamental selves, or our spirit.
So let’s look at some examples. If someone works out consistently, day in and day out, the behaviors and habits they develop over time trigger epigenetic changes that lead to the creation of proteins. Yes, you will become stronger, healthier, and more muscular. Additionally, you are forming new neural connections and wiring your mind to become more disciplined. Over time, the repetitive behavior of concerted effort in working out develops the characteristic of discipline, making a person, at their core, more disciplined. What if a person chooses to be indulgent and slovenly? Rather than working out and eating healthy, they choose to sit all day, watch lots of TV or social media, eat poorly, and drink alcohol. The changes that occur in the body and mind will be quickly apparent. But also, that person’s core has conditioned themselves to be more slovenly. What about someone who frequently lies? If someone chooses to lie daily, at some point, lying will become so ingrained in their nature that it becomes their de facto mode. They have effectively become liars in essence.
I know it may seem that by defining the spirit as a biological process, it can be perceived that I am referring to the character and personality dimensions of a person’s mind. But what I’m really getting at is if, over time, our very cells are changing as a result of the choices we are making, well then, what is more fundamental than cellular and epigenetic changes throughout the body? 
As an agnostic, I’m still very much open to all possibilities, and I look forward to what we will discover in the future. In the meantime, the adage ‘you are what you eat’ seems to hold. And I’d take it a step further and say all your choices, actions, and experiences add up to determine what version of yourself you’ll be in the future. And that at least means that we do have some agency in determining our fundamental, future self.
Saro Varjabedian is an award-winning filmmaker, storyteller, and spiritual explorer whose work blends creativity with contemplative inquiry. “Tim And Robot: A Spiritual Agnostic’s Guidance To A Newly Formed Consciousness” is his debut book out on October 1st, wherever you get your books.
Book Link: https://books2read.com/TimandRobot
Website: www.anagnosticapproach.com
